Settling

We're finally (mostly) moved into our new place. I'll definitely be doing a photo tour in the coming weeks. We went from a 900sqft  2 bedroom cottage at $1375/month to an 1125sqft 3 bedroom apartment for $1000/month. Plus, huge kitchen, formal dining room, secluded lawn, country store across the street, playground up the road, etc. So, good move all around.

Except...

We have too much stuff. Way too much. Half the crap we moved I had forgotten we owned, and of that, 75% is stuff I don't care about, much less see a need to store here. So, it'll all be sold off and/or donated. Our only moving hiccup was that our couch would not fit through the door. So we had to find a new one- fast. I arranged one from a lease to own place, which is pretty much the #1 worst financial decision ever. But, we needed a couch asap, and they offer a 120 day 'same as cash' thing. So we'll only pay retail price for it. It's more than I would want to spend on a couch, but it's pretty, Seth likes it, it's huge, portable, and whatever. If the worst thing to happen to us right now is a new couch, and being able to afford it, I'll take it.

The babies are adjusting well. I'm finally on the right dose of meds for me. I feel good. Some days are better than others, but overall, I feel really okay. I decided to take some time off school. It's just too much right now. I was worried about not working when the loan payments start. But, we qualify to be able to pay them based on our income. Since I make nothing, and we have two babies, the payments are more than affordable and won't require me to pick up a part time job or anything.

Haven is 5 months old now. I cannot wrap my head around it. Liam is nearly 2 1/2. Where is the time going? I'm watching them both grow out of barely worn clothes, feeling how it's becoming a tight fit to snuggle all three of us on the couch together. Clinging to the images of newborn babies and the first time they smiled, laughed, lifted their heads. Haven is eating real food already. Bananas. Holding pretzels. Cutting teeth. He's able to work his own pacifiers back into his mouth. Able to barrel roll across the room if he wants to. Liam is speaking in full sentences, starting to recognize letters and words. He's counting, singing songs from memory. It all just seems to be rushing by so quickly. I love watching them grow, but I wish it would all just slow down a little. Just a little. I cherish nap time because I can just really look at them, and see how beautiful they are without one of them needing 100% of me right at that moment.

Seth and I are ridiculously, annoyingly, crazily in love. :-)

Sometimes, my life is incredibly dark. Sometimes, I'm terrified. But today, my world is beautiful. And warm.

Not feeling it

I haven't blogged in a while. Bluntly, I just haven't been feeling like it. School is overwhelming. Life is overwhelming. Most days, I just barely hover at simply being able to function. The depression is back full force, and the medication is doing absolutely nothing to help it. I'm in an incredibly dark place, and my only goal is making it through the day without my children seeing just how broken I actually am. That takes more energy than I usually have. So by the time they're in bed and I can actually just let it out, there's too much housework and school work to give myself time to grieve.

It seems weird, needing to grieve. But it is what I need. To grieve the loss of the person I used to be. When I was hopeful about my life, my children, my everything. Now, I just go through the motions with the glimmer of hope that they'll end up ok at the end. I've lost all hope for me. I'm a shell. A medicated shell of the woman I once was. I had hopes, dreams, goals. Plans of how our life would be, how beautiful it would be. Now it's just the realization that I am a mother, stuck in my situation, suffering from so far untreatable mental illness.

My kids are safe. I'm safe. They'll hopefully never experience the turmoil I claw my way through daily. I could never walk away from them. I can't ever stop trying to be a good mother, even at the cost of myself. The only support system I have is my husband. And his job and own stress leaves him with little to spare. I prefer that the little he can give, he gives to the kids. They need that.

Me? I need time to grieve the loss of me, time to heal these deep wounds. And that's time I simply don't have.

Now, it's time to clean the disgusting mess my home has become. Time to mother my children. Time to hold on to the last shred of of willpower I have- even if it only gets me through the rest of the day.

Easy Crockpot Vegan Stew

As usual, my photos rock.

This meal is ugly, but oh so yummy.

To fill a 6qt crock pot.

1 can beans of your choice
1 cup lentils (or another can of beans)
1 bag each: frozen spinach, frozen mixed vegetables
1 cup textured vegetable protein (or 1/2lb ground beef)
1 cup vegan sausage crumbles (or 1 cup cooked sausage)
1 can stewed tomatoes, with juice
3 cups vegetable stock (or beef stock or water)
3-4 large onions
5-6 large potatoes
4-5 celery stalks
3-4 carrots

Dump everything except the onions, potatoes, tvp, and 1 cup of the stock in the crock pot.
Brown the onions in a little oil. Add to crock pot.
Dice potatoes, celery and carrots. Add to crock pot.
Reconstitute the tvp with the reserved stock. Let sit ten minutes. Then add to crock pot.

On low, this will take 6-7 hours. You want to check the doneness of the lentils about 4 hours in. If they still have significant crunch, crank it up to high. When the lentils are soft, this is ready.

Season with salt and pepper right before serving. Potatoes absorb salt and will pull the salt flavor right out of the stew if you add it too early.

Facebook

I'm taking a break from Facebook this weekend. In fact, unless I leave the house alone, my phone is off all weekend. I decided that I need some time to reconnect with my family. We're so busy lately between school, work, babies, errands, etc. It'll be nice to devote two days to my husband and kids.

I've been on the Zoloft for about 4 weeks now. I feel really good. There's still some groggy parts to my day, but overall- I'm a new person. There have been no freakouts, no panic attacks. I haven't even filled my new Xanax prescription because I just haven't needed it. I'm on a low dose of Zoloft, but it feels like I just needed something to take the edge of.

The kids are great! Liam finally figured out how to enunciate "r", so ice cream and the like are coming out perfectly. Haven is growing like a weed and in that giggly grasping for everything stage. He's sleeping about ten hours a night, with only one food break in the middle.

Overall, life is good. I have some recipes and such to post next week, so keep an eye out for those!

Granola bars

So impossibly easy.

4 cups oatmeal
1/2 cup chia seeds
1/4 cup dried cherries
1/2 cup raw almonds, chopped
1/3 cup coconut oil
1/2 cup peanut butter
1/3 cup honey or maple syrup
1 teaspoon cinnamon

Mix the first four in a large bowl.
Mix the last four in a pan and bring to a boil. Then pour over the dry mix and stir well.
Pour into foil or parchment lined 9x13 pan. Then even out and smooth. These are baked at 350 for 15 minutes, or until edges and top are browned.
Rest five minutes, then lift out liner. Use a knife to cut into bars. Let cool completely before handling.
Best stored in fridge, in air tight container. But can be put in a baggie for travel.

Lunch

This was so easy!

Add 1/2 cup quinoa and 1 cup water to a pan. Bring to a boil, then lower heat, cover and simmer for 12-15 minutes.

Dump on a plate. In pan, add 1-2 cups spinach, 1-2 cups halved brussel sprouts, 1/2 cup white beans and 1 cup cooked vegan sausage. Cook over medium for about 8 minutes.

Add quinoa back in and stir to combine.

Apple Cinnamon Granola

I paid $7 for a tiny bag of granola last night. And realized while happily munching it, that I have everything I need to make granola. So, I made some. For less than half that for a big quart jar.

My preferred way to eat it is like cereal with some almond milk.

This recipe isn't an exact thing. You can use nearly anything in it. General rule of thumb is for every cup of "dry", use 1/2 cup of "wet". But, here how I made mine.

In a large bowl I mixed 3 cup rolled oats, 3/4 cup flaked organic coconut, 1/2 cup flax seeds, 1/2 cup raw sunflower seeds, and 1/4 cup chia seeds.

I then grated 2 gala apples and put them in a pan with about 1 1/2 cups of water, a pinch of cinnamon, and a pinch of salt. I simmered this over medium heat until it was pretty much applesauce with some apple 'shreds' left. I then added 1/4 cup honey and 1/3 cup coconut oil. If you don't want to use any oil, just add more applesauce.

Then I mixed the wet into the dry and baked at 300 for about an hour, stirring every 10 minutes or so. You want a golden brown color.

Next time, I'd like to add some dried apples, strawberries, or bananas. Maybe some slivered almonds. You really can put whatever that you like in. You can even swap out the honey for maple syrup or another liquid sweetener. Don't like apples? Try some pear. 

But for my quick breakfast needs, this is perfect.

Apple Sandwich

My toddler has hit the picky eater stage. If it's not in nugget or chip form, he doesn't want it. Unless it's a peanut butter sandwich. Seth sent me a link with fun food tips. This was one of them.

Core an apple and slice it thinly into rings. Then just slap some nut butter on a ring and top it with another slice.

Yummy snack.
Happy toddler.

Nachos!

These are vegan. But feel free to sub in your dairy and meaty crap, lol.

Bag of Wegmans Organic white corn tortilla chips (or whatever you like)

2/3c lentils + 1c vegan "meat" crumbles OR 1c beans OR ground meat

1 packet taco seasoning OR 1T of your fave taco seasoning

1/2 bag Daiya cheddar shreds + 1/4 wedge Daiya Jack OR 1.5C shredded cheese of your choice

1/4C unsweetened almond milk OR 1/4C milky whatever you like

Salsa

Whatever veggies you like on nachos.

Ok. Boil the lentils in some salted water until mashable. Drain and set aside. 

Brown up whatever meatiness you're using.

Add the lentils to the meaty bits, then add taco seasoning and about 1/4C water. Simmer over medium low for 5 minutes, then cover and put aside.

Mix your cheese choice with your milk choice and whisk over medium low until saucy.

Dump some chips on a plate, add your meat and cheese, then top with salsa and your favorite toppings.

I triple up the meat-ish stuff and cheese. It makes an easy lunch throughout the week. 

This would also work well as a meaty mac and cheese, or layered and baked, or crammed in a pita for a fun sammich. Whatever rocks your world. <3

Carrot Slaw

Boy was this yummy!

4 large carrots, shredded (I used a julienne peeler)
1/2c mayo (I used Earth Balance Mindful Mayo)
3T vinegar
1/2t salt
1t black pepper

Mix together and refrigerate for at least an hour.
This will be a staple dish around here. I'm already dreaming up lettuce wraps involving this slaw and some falafel or beany balls.

Health

We picked a great year to stick with our crappy health coverage. Ugh. I've been more sick in the last 6 weeks than I have been cumulatively in my entire life. I have an appointment Wednesday to try and figure out what's going on. I'm leaning towards chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia. Definitely depression and anxiety, which both the CFS and fibro can cause.

Bluntly, I feel like shit.

For the last few weeks, Seth has stayed up all night with Haven. Every night. I was getting up to pump around midnight, then back up at 5 for the day. But it led to Seth having to come home from work because I was freaking out nearly daily. I would hit around 1pm and just lose my shit. The exhaustion and stress was killing me daily. So, I started sleeping all night. Sometimes going to bed as early as 7pm, and not being able to drag myself out of bed before 7:30 the next morning. And even then, I'm yawning and falling asleep less than 4 hours later. By the time Seth got home today, early, I'm done. I'm curled up in the recliner trying to stay awake. I slept 12 hours last night.

My body hurts. Everywhere. Touching my skin feels like it's burning me. My joints ache. My muscles feel constantly pulled. The headaches are unbearable much of the time.

My mind hurts. My heart is heavy. I have been feeling the blanket of depression creeping up for weeks. Normally I just let it run its course. But this time, the panic attacks and anxiety are beyond what I know how to deal with. And I cannot risk my husband's job for this.

So, the plan. An anti-depressant. And probably Xanax or something similar for the freak-outs. The only treatment for CFS and the fibro that has been proven effective is low impact exercise. Oh, that's also been shown to help depression. So I'm hoping to also make it to the fitness center a few nights a week to use the elliptical machine. Once we move, I'll look into getting a treadmill or something. Medication is always a last resort for me. But these issues are beyond anything I've experience before, and they're beyond what I can do on my own.

My reason for posting this is because I think that as mothers, and as women, we often forget to take care of ourselves. We're so wrapped up in our kids, our lives, or responsibilities, that WE fall to the wayside. I should have had my butt into our doctor weeks ago, even before Haven was born. At every appointment for Haven and Liam (5 all together), he asked how I was doing, did I need anything, etc. And it took me until today to finally make time for that appointment- the one for ME. Who will take care of my babies if I let me fall apart?

Please, take a day and do for YOU. Whether that means catching up on a book, getting a pedicure, going to the gym, taking a long walk, taking a long bath.. whatever you need to do something to recenter yourself, DO IT.


Here's a photo of my moose:

Easiest lunch ever

Mash up an avocado. Mix with an equal amount of hummus. Enjoy with veggies or chips.
I have been eating this daily for lunch. Mostly because I can make it one handed.
Pro tip: keep the pit in your container of mushed or chopped avocado. It'll keep it from browning.

Ugh

I'm currently down for the count with a head cold. My poor husband has had to pick up the slack for me today. My oldest is testing every limit he can find. If he isn't getting into things, he's responding to every thing he is being told by grunting a response. That is absolutely infuriating. The little one is in a grumpy growth spurt.
I got nothing done today. So, tomorrow I get to cram in a solo 3 hour round trip to drop on donated breast milk to a friend, grocery shop, go to BJ's for the things we buy there, get the mountain of laundry done, and still try to spend some time with my own family. That doesn't include the meal prep for the week. All while sick. I am not a happy camper.

On a high note, I sold my Mac for a grand and replaced it with a $250 Chromebook. So that's $750 towards our moving and stuff. We don't need to really pay for much, but knocking out another debt or having that much more to put towards a new car will be a huge help for us.

I've also stuck to my cash budget so far. I paid the bills online and pulled the cash for the rest. The cards are all put away, and only my envelope for that specific task leaves with me. It's working out really well for me this month.

I'll post more when this cold vacates.

Just photos

February Budget

Well, how's this for transparency? Here's my February budget. It is done in percentages. Why? Well, because it makes me more aware of the money. I like slashing these numbers, lol.

Total Income: 100%

Rent: 33.53%
Car: 6.72%
Geico: 1.90%
Time Warner: 1.82%
NYSEG: 2.73%
Hulu/Netflix: .41%
Squaretrade: .34%
Cell Phones: 2.19%

So, there's our standard, every month, can't be adjusted bills.

Seth: 4.8%
Miranda: 2.4%
House: 3.65%

That's our "spending" money. It's basically the cash we use for discretionary spending. Fun money, stuff for the kids, if I break a dish or whatever. This is also non-negotioable, and a system that works well for us, and gives us each some control over "our own" money. This month, "house spending" goes to cloth diapers and essential oils.

Groceries: 14.6% this month (we're due for a huge pantry restock)
Gas: 6.09%

So, what's left? 18.64% And that goes to pay more on credit cards. 4.11% will pay yet another one completely off. Then we just continue working on down the list.

The issue here is rent, clearly. And we found a place that will save us about $400/month. We move in May.



Now, my budget does need tweaking. We want a maintenance fund. Cash always on hands for vehicle repairs, medical deductibles, and so on. I have seen budgets that separate each little category out ($75 for car, $50 for this, $100 for that) and I'll be honest- I'm not that organized. For me, $2500 in a savings account is all we need. If we need to use it, the next month, we pay minimums on everything until it's replenished.

So, there it is. The last 5 categories will be pulled from the bank, in cash, on Friday. Then there's no way to overspend.

Easy Peasy Black & Beany

Along with the vegan change, I've also gone gluten free. Partly in due to reading "Wheat Belly", a book about the effects of modern wheat on the body. You see, wheat as we know it is a modified crop, and not a great one. In fact, an emerging study confirms the thought that consumption of wheat leads to obesity, diabetes, etc.

My downfall is CARBS. Breads, pastas, pastries, etc. I assumed finding GF replacements for these things would be hard. Well, no. My grocery store carries several lines of gluten free bread products. My favorite so far are Sandwich Petals. They are basically an oval tortilla. Load up half with sammich fixin's, fold the other half over, done. But I've also learned my city has a gluten free bakery. So I'll be headed there this weekend. Eventually, I'd like to make my own breads and such. That'll happen when I sleep more than 3 hours at a time.

I am EXHAUSTED. Two kids is no joke! So I've been relying on some convenience products. And while good, $4.00 for two gluten free vegan veggie burgers is a bit steep. So today I made some. And you can too.

Mash the bejeezus out of two cans of organic beans. I use Goya organic black beans and chick peas. Add in 1/2 cup each of oats (or whatever GF grain you like), flax meal ($1.50 a bag right now at Big Lots), and water. Then spice to your heart's content. I just did a splash of Bragg's liquid aminos and some salt and pepper. But I bet some roasted red peppers, caramelized onion, chipotle, whatever.. would be amazing.

Then just form into patties and fry over medium with the oil of your choosing. I like coconut oil- always virgin, organic, cold pressed.

I had one for lunch, and there's enough stuff for at least 10 more. So, costwise, you're looking at about 22 cents a burger as I made them. Even with some fancy bread, veggies for toppings, etc, it's still a meal for under 50 cents.

Confessions

One: I took "no poo" a bit too far.

I even stopped using soap to clean my body.

Nothing but baking soda to scrub me down in the shower. Strangely, it's been awesome! NO body odor, not even my underarms. No dry skin. No greasy skin. My face and shoulders have stopped breaking out. My feet aren't nearly as dry and cracked. It's like my body stopped freaking out and is just getting back to taking care of itself.

I think we forget that our skin is an organ. And aside from the physical scrubbing of a wash cloth to remove the dirt and grime of the day, we truly do not have to slather it in chemicals. I mean, do what you want, but I'm done with soaps and lotions. Baking soda, coconut oil if I need a little extra help, and that's it.

Two: Left to my own devices, I can ruin a budget. I cannot be trusted.

So, my plastic all stays home with husband when I go out unless it's a specific amount for a specific purchase. There's no willy nilly purchasing. There can't be. Because I'll overspend and ruin my meticulously put together budget. Next month, I have a very clearly defined budget with categories that are set up for cash spending. They include groceries, gas, and spending (mine, Seth's, house). That's easy enough. Since we're paid monthly, I'll pull it all out in one shot and set up the envelopes. I've found some great cash budget envelope systems on Etsy.com, but haven't bought one yet because I can't find one in fabric I like. So I'll be sticking with a method of labeling and sticking envelopes in my wallet.

Three: I'm secretly (ahem, WAS secretly) thrilled at the idea of getting a new (to us) car. We had planned to pay mine off and drive it for at least another year. Well, the transmission is starting to slip. We owe exactly what it's worth. So next month, it'll be traded in on something else. For something with a loan for about what we owe now. We'll use the tax return to pay the difference in cash. So it'll end up a few years newer vehicle, for what we're paying right now. Our plan doesn't change much. Just the vehicle, and how we planned to use the refund.

This is the last year we'll expect a refund. We'll be changing the W-4. Here's why:
I cannot recall a single thing we've used our big 'ol tax refund for. Aside from giving the government an interest free loan every year, we spent the money on bullshit. If your W-4 is done right, you should break even at year's end. Anyone who anticipates a large refund is doing it wrong. True, plain and simple.

We'll get back several thousand this year. I can sure think of ways a few hundred dollars "extra" monthly would completely change my budget and how quickly we pay off these debts.

It was to me, and might be to you, worth doing the IRS withholding calculator on their website and seeing if maybe you shouldn't make some changes in your own life and situation.

Four: I learned today that if I have a complete meltdown, a manicure and chair massage work wonders. Pricey? Yep. Did I need it? You betcha. I don't budget the hell out of us to be mean. I do it so I can go do things like that, and be able to afford it.

Have a great rest of the week!

No 'Poo and deodorant free.

No poo. Wouldn't that be nice? No more poopy diapers.. ahhhh.  A mama can dream. Or stop making babies. But, since the latter isn't likely to happen, dreaming it is.

This post isn't about poop. Or diapers. But about getting rid of shampoo. I had a frugal fit last year and began stocking up when there was a sale. Mostly on personal care items. So I now have a big box of shampoos, body wash, etc. Guess who's developed sensitivities to all of it? I've even tried some hypoallergenic snake oil type products, to no avail. I'll spare you the photos, but I broke out in a an oozing, gross rash from mid arm, down my arm pits, and onto my breasts and belly from a supposed hypoallergenic deodorant.

Lovely.

What fixed it? Coconut oil, a few drops of tea tree oil, and keeping my arms in the air for days. Though that last part is more due to the pain of lowering my arms. So, I stopped wearing deodorant entirely. Mostly of fear of the rash coming back. Since then, I've noticed something weird/good. I don't stink. Well, not right away. As long as I wash out my pits, apply a dab of coconut oil, and remember to do that daily, no smell. Sweat is how the body flushes toxins. So I don't mind a little sweatiness here and there. Coconut oil is anti fungal and anti microbial, among other things. So, no more buying deodorant. My plan for if I know I'll be getting sweaty and gross is to also use some baking soda.

The no 'poo method I'm using a simple. I filled a spare peri-bottle (basically a water bottle with a pop top) with 8oz of warm water, 1 tablespoon of baking soda, and shook. It's hanging out in the shower. Every few days, I "shampoo" my hair with that. Followed by a similar dilution of vinegar and water as a rinse. Conditioner is the tiniest amount of coconut oil applied to damp hair. Done and done.

My hair is in the "ewwww greeeeeeeasy" mode currently while it figures out what to do with its own oils. This phase is temporary. and given that my current hair style is 'pin my bangs out of my effin face', not noticeable at all to anyone but me.

So, there you have it. 4 more products gone (deodorant, shampoo, conditioner, leave in treatment), and replaced with things that cost pennies per month.

Vegan

My new year has been off to great start. As of last Monday, I've (so far) adopted a completely vegan lifestyle... almost. I have two things that make me not fit within the parameters. However, I don't eat any animal products.. so I wouldn't say I'm vegetarian either.

Honey and wool. For me, adopting a vegan way of life is about the prevention of the mistreatment of animals. In my eyes, "Stealing" honey from bees does not harm them. In fact, I feel it promotes a plant-based diet by causing those little buzzy bees to go out and pollenate to resupply their honey. So, there's that.

I've seen sheep. On farms. Who supply wool. I don't feel a hair cut is mistreating them. Were they left to their own devices, the matting and other issues than come from an unkempt sheep's coat is far worse than a trim seasonly.

I don't regularly use honey, and I don't own wool. I just don't see issue with either.

So I definitely don't fit the hardcore vegan mold, but eliminating my impact on the cruelty done to farm food animals has made me feel like a whole person. I have always been an activist for the treatment of dogs, namely pit bulls, and other domestic animals. I've decided that ALL animals deserve that same treatment.

Anywho. Here's a soup I threw together.

Super Soup

1 can each - black beans, cannellini beans, chickpeas
1 cup each, chopped- onion, carrots, kale/spinach, celery
1/2 cup each- wild rice, quinoa, barley
To taste- salt, pepper, garlic
6-8 cups water or vegetable stock

Crock pot on low for 6 hours.

If wanted, you can also add a cup or so of precooked, diced chicken or beef.

And here's baby photos! Haven is 6 weeks old today, and Liam turned 2 years old on January 6th. The top photo is Haven cracking a real smile, which he now does regularly. The bottom photo is in Liam's newly created play/nap room. We still do a family bedroom, but we do not cosleep with either child. I made Seth go down to a queen size mattress, and he hogs the entire thing, lol. So, Liam is in a toddler bed across the room, and Haven sleeps in his bassinet next to me. I love cosleeping. But as it turns out, Mama doesn't actually sleep when there's babies in the bed.

Excuse the short post! We've been down with this nasty flu for days.

We're going chemical free!

So, something that has been bothering me, along with the crap in our food, is the crap in my house. Crap along the lines of clutter, which is selling nicely on eBay, and crap along the lines of chemicals. In the cleaning supplies, the personal care items, everything. Nearly every product we have in this house is packed full of nasty chemicals, post of which are shown to be carcinogens, irritants, etc. I've had enough.

As I can, I'll be finding and/or developing recipes to eliminate pretty much every product we have. That is everything from cleaners to toothpaste, to deodorant, even so far as the shampoo, all hair products, and so on. There is one single exception to this. Sol-U-Mel. It's a cleaner made by Melaleuca. It's ingredients are alcohol, green soap, and tea tree oil. And I love it. I use it for everything. A capful in every laundry load, the only all purpose cleaner here, air freshener, stain remover. This stuff took black Sharpie off untreated wood. It can be put in bath water to treat all kinds of skin issues, and I've gone so far as to treat a pimple with it. There's several web pages dedicated to it's uses. I'm not including a link or plugging the product, because at some point, I'll be making a homemade version. Some people swear by adding tea tree oil to Dr. Bronner's Castile Soap. I plan to try that.

I already make my own toothpaste. Why? Well, it's simple. The ingredients in most commercial toothpastes are scary. And even in the 'natural' versions, most include glycerin. Glycerin is no good for the teeth. It leaves a film on your teeth that not only takes a full month of glycerin-free brushing to remove, it also inhibits the ability for the teeth to remineralize, which they CAN do. One of the best tools out there for that is xylitol. Xylitol is derived from the bark of birch trees. Additionally, it is something found naturally occurring in the human body, as well as several plants. A great resource is the book Kiss Your Dentist Goodbye. I believe it's available on Amazon.

Anyway, in several European countries, Xylitol has been widely used for dental health for decades. Like many things, the US is slow in adopting it. Here, it is my sweetener of choice.

My cell phone photos are awesome.

The little jar up front is my toothpaste. And here's how I make it.

2 parts xylitol to 1 part coconut oil, plus a few drops of olive oil. And that's it. Warm the coconut oil, add the xylitol land olive oil. Stir.

I buy my xylitol granulated. You can whiz it in a food processor, but I don't. The olive oil is because coconut oil is hard at room temp. Adding a little olive oil prevents that.

You can also add flavoring, but I don't bother. I'll be making Seth a cinnamon version when his tube of toothpaste runs out.

I store mine in a little jar, but you can put it in anything. A travel toiletry bottle. An old toothpaste tube: cut the end up, fill with the toothpaste and tape shut.

Xylitol can also be used on its own as a rinse. Just put 1/8 teaspoon in your mouth, let it mix with your saliva and swish it around for 20 minutes. I swish while I'm in the shower.

So, anytime I update a product, I'll post the recipe.